So its almost two weeks in to the new year, and maybe that resolution made after a couple of glasses of wine on New Year’s Eve isn’t looking so hot.  Maybe it was never a good idea.  Let’s not start the year focusing on failure – it is time to face up to the fact that the time is now to gracefully rescind that resolution.

First – does anyone know? If no, phew, take a deep breath that you had the presence of mind to not to share it.  Don’t shame yourself about it – we’ve all had those moments of swearing to keep the house clean every night.  Does it always happen, no.  Is it largely your fault?  Nope, lots of credit goes to those waist-height dictators that throw their shit in the air and just don’t care.  Consider reducing your resolution, from every night to every other night, or once a week, or 15 minutes before company, like the rest of us.  Hey-why do you think the rest of us keep our houses like shit-holes.  For the laughs?

If someone does know, is it Facebook?  Because you can go on and delete that shit like it never happened.  And if anyone else asks, say you were hacked.  It may not have been a Ray-Ban sunglasses ad, but it is still egregious that someone would have posted that on your page!

If someone does know and you can’t delete them?  You mean like a hubby, best friend or parent?  Tell them they were drunk.  They must have remembered incorrectly.  They don’t drink?  Suggest someone slipped a roofie in their drink and they’ve replaced the events of that portion of the night with their imagination.  Chances are they don’t know the effects of a roofie, and if they challenge that, suggest perhaps they know too much about roofies.

And next year, consider making resolutions that are more achievable – like always finishing wine when you open it.  I win that resolution every year!

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